Tuesday, August 22, 2017



JOKES: 8 20 17

A   doctor that had been seeing an 80-year-old woman for most of her life finally retired.  At her next check-up, the new doctor  told  her to bring a list of all the medicines  that had been prescribed for  her.  As the doctor was  looking through these his eyes grew wide as  he realized  Grandma had a prescription for birth control pills.    "Mrs. Smith, do you realize these are birth control   pills?"   "Yes, they help me sleep at night."   "Mrs. Smith, I assure you  there is absolutely nothing in  these that could possibly help you sleep!"  She  reached out and patted the young doctor's knee and  said,  "Yes, dear, I know that.  But every morning, I  grind one up and mix it in the glass of orange juice  that my 16-year-old  Granddaughter drinks.  And  believe me it definitely helps me sleep  at night."   You gotta love Grandmas!

A   man was riding on a full bus minding his own business when the  gorgeous  woman next to him started to breast-feed her  baby.  The baby  wouldn't take it so she said, "Come  on sweetie, eat it all up or I'll  have to give it to this  nice man next to us."  Five  minutes  later the  baby was still not feeding, so she said, "Come on, honey.  Take it or I'll give it to this nice man  here."  A few  minutes later the anxious man blurted  out, "Come on kid.  Make up  your mind!  I was supposed to get off four stops ago!"

Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam.  The  last question was,  'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk.'  The   question was worth 70 points or none at all.  One student  was hard  put to think of seven advantages.  He  wrote:
1)   It is perfect  formula for the child.
2)   It provides  immunity against several diseases.
3)    It is always the right temperature.
4)    It is inexpensive.
5)   It bonds the  child to mother and vice versa.
6)   It is always available as needed.
And  then the  student was stuck.  Finally, in desperation, just  before the bell rang indicating the end of the test he  wrote:
7)   It comes in two attractive  containers and it's high enough off the  ground where the cat can't get it.  He got an A.

An  old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying.  He calls his grandson to his  bedside.  "Guido, I wan' you lissina me.  I wan' you to take-a  my chrome  plated 38 revolver so you will always remember me."   "But  grandpa, I really don't  like guns.  How  about you leave me  your Rolex watch instead?"  "You  lissina me, boy!  Somma day  you gonna be runna da  business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa  money, a  big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos.  Then one-a  day  you gonna comea home  and maybe finda you wife  inna bed with another man.  Whatta you gonna do  then?  Pointa to you watch and say, 'Times up?' "

A  woman and her 12-year-old son  were riding in a taxi in Detroit.  It  was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings.   "Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women  doing?"   "They're  waiting for their husbands to  get off work," she  replied.  The taxi driver turns  around and says, "Geez lady, why  don't you tell him the  truth?  They're hookers, boy!  They  have sex  with men for money."  The little boy's eyes get wide  and  he says, "Is that  true Mom?"  His mother,  glaring hard at the  driver, answers "Yes."  After a  few minutes the kid asks, "Mom, if  those women have  babies, what happens to them?"  She said, "Most of   them become taxi drivers."

An   elderly, but hardy cattleman from Texas once told a young  female  neighbor that if she wanted to live a long life,  the secret was to  sprinkle a pinch of gunpowder on her  oatmeal each morning.  She did this religiously  and lived to the age of 103.  She left  behind 14  children, 30 grandchildren, 21 great-grandchildren, five great-great-grandchildren and a 40 foot hole where the  crematorium used  to be.

The other day, a gentleman went to the dentist's office to have a tooth pulled. 
The dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give him a shot.
"No way! No needles! I hate needles", the man said. 
The dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and the man immediately objected.
"I can't do the gas thing either; the thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating me!"


The dentist then asks the gentleman if he has any objection to taking a pill.
"No objection", the man said. "I'm fine with pills".
The dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet".
The gentleman, totally at a loss for words, said in amazement, "WOW, I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!"
"It doesn't", said the dentist, "but it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth."
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KEYBOARD SHORTCUTS FOR FASTER WEB BROWSING:

1. HIT SPACE BAR; SCROLLS  DOWN A PAGE.
SHIFT + SPACE BAR GETS YOU BACK.

2. GO BACK TO PREVIOUS WEB SITE; ALT +  BACK ARROW.
ALT  +  FORWARD ARROW TAKES YOU BACK

3. URL BAR, DO CONTROL + L

4. TABS;
TO OPEN,    CONTROL T
TO CLOSE,  CONTROL W
TO REOPEN, CONTROL SHIFT + T

5. BOOKMARK A PAGE, CONTROL D

6. CONTROL  +  PLUS SIGN; MAKES TYPE LARGER
    CONTROL  +  MINUS SIGN; MAKES TYPE SMALLER

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SMILE:  JERMAINE JACKSON

TOP GUN

SINK THE BISMARK

007

 AT LAST:  GLENN MILLER

Glenn Miller movie in stereo - Orchestra Wives

SUN VALLEY SERENADE


Wednesday, August 16, 2017


Q. How is Joe? Question? I would like to get a TV channel on my laptop 
I think its call Netflix? They have old shows Do you know how I can do this.

A.
1.    Netflix has three plans, the cheapest is $7.99 per month:
2.    I think it only works on TV.

For some that work on a laptop:

SINK THE BISMARCK

            The Enemy Below 1957

You're in the Navy Now.... Gary Cooper













            Lots of Movies: TOP GUN PREVIEW

For more links go to: www.youtube.com  
 .

Sunday, July 16, 2017

YOU WILL LOVE THESE: HOW TO SAVE A WEB SITE.

IN GOOGLE:
Reduce the size of the web site page so you can see the DESKTOP
At the left of the address bar, left click the icon in front of the http or www and drag it to the DESKTOP.

























IN MICROSOFT EDGE:
HOW TO PIN A WEB SITE TILE TO START
Open the web site in Microsoft EDGE, right click the 3 dots at the upper right
then click on Pin to this page to Start, click Yes in the
next menu.






Friday, June 30, 2017



SUGGESTIONS FOR YOUR NEW Windows 10 Computer.
(The speed of your new computer is going to be a lot faster than your old one.)

Processor: Latest generation Intel core i3, i5, i7 processor or AMD equivalent. Get i5 .

Memory: 4 to 8 GB DDR3  Get 8 GB

Ports: Should have both USB3 and USB2 Ports (USB3 is 10 times faster than USB2)

Hard Drive:  a 256 GB or larger Solid-State Hard Drive: it would give you lightning speed, use less power, enjoy faster performance.  SSD drives are faster than a speeding bullet.

Webcam: comes with a Laptop.

LCD Monitor: 15.6" or 17” for a Laptop, for a Desktop 24".

DVD-RW Drive: To burn CD's or DVD's.

Digital Media Reader: For your Digital Camera memory stick.

Go to; http://www.ckcs.org/joetips.pdf and click on WINDOWS 10 TIPS

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Thursday, June 15, 2017

JULY 2017  TIPS



Intel Core i9:  Intel's Core i9 family will have up to 18 cores and 36 threads, possibly the most powerful consumer PC chips ever made.

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Windows 10 Creators Update: Microsoft's latest update fixes a load of bugs
A new cumulative update for the Windows 10 Creators Update addresses 14 bugs affecting the browser, peripherals, and third-party messaging apps.


WINDOWS 10 BEST NEW FEATURES:

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GREAT COMPUTER TRICKS:

1. CHANGE TEXT CASE WITHOUT RETYPING IN MICROSOFT WORD.
HIGHLIGHT AND DO SHIFT + F3

2. SHARE A SCREEN SHOT WITHOUT SAVING IT.
USE THE SNIPPING TOOL.

3. SAVE INK AND PRINT FASTER.
WHEN PRINTING OUT TEXT DOCUMENTS, CHANGE THE TEXT COLOR TO GREY.

THIS WAY, YOU'LL BE SPEEDING UP THE PRINTING TIME AND SAVING BLACK INK WITHOUT ALTERING THE QUALITY.

4. MINIMIZE ALL WINDOWS EXCEPT THE ACTIVE ONE.
JUST GRAB AND SHAKE THE ACTIVE ONE.

5. ENTER NEW WEB PAGES WITH EASE.
HIT F-6 TO HIGHLIGHT THE ADDRESS BAR.

FOR EVEN MORE EASE, YOU CAN TYPE IN THE NAME OF THE WEBSITE WITHOUT 'WWW' AND '.COM' AND DO CONTROL ENTER

 6. DO CONTROL + A TO HIGHLIGHT THE WHOLE PAGE.
OR CLICK ONCE ON THE START POINT AND SHIFT + CLICK ON THE END POINT.


Whitney Houston,  I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU
The Tango - Scent of a Woman (4/8) Movie CLIP (1992) HD

TANGO 





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Wednesday, May 17, 2017






 
18 CHANNELS OF FREE HIGH DEF TV
This is all free, just buy an Antenna.

1. WLEX has 3 channels
2. WKYT has 3 channels
3. WTVQ has 6 channels
4. WDKY has 2 channels
5. KET    has 4 channels

I get beautiful color on my 24 inch TV.
I live in the north end of Fayette County.
Depending on where you live will determine reception.
I use a Antenna with an Amplifier.




I bought it through Amazon.com

1byone Amplified HDTV Antenna - 50 Mile Range with Detachable Amplifier USB Power Supply and 10ft Coax Cable $29.99

Monday, May 8, 2017

MAY 8  2017 TIPS:

Support for the original version (1507) of Windows 10 ends May 9

Microsoft is forcing you to update to Version 1703 if you want future Windows updates.
We had Version 1507, then 1607, and now 1703 the latest version.
-----------------------------------------------
Here is the way it should look when you click on Start icon, then the Gear icon  for Setting, Display, About.
-----------------------------------------------
If not go to click on Start icon, then the Gear icon  for Setting, Update and security, Windows update, Check of Windows Update.
------------------------------------------------

From Gene Wheeler:    TV LISTINGS: SPECTRUM:

Microsoft will now release major Windows 10 updates every March and September.
The next one arrives this September.

Control-Shift-T, which reopens the last tab closed in Google Chrome.

Andrea Rieu: Qué Será, Será 2011   ENJOY


Saturday, April 15, 2017


The Windows 10 Creators Update is a big deal.
It will come to you as a regular Microsoft update, newer computers will get the update first, it rolled out April 11. It may take a while before you get it, it is a big download. Big improvements including better security. Takes about 30 minutes to download with a Solid State Drive, otherwise about an hour.

Microsoft Edge browser getting better

1. Recurring Cortana reminders

2. Dynamic Lock; Just pair it with your computer and Windows 10 will use the Bluetooth connection to determine your proximity and will lock your PC when you stray too far. 

3.  A new Touchpad settings page lets you configure three- and four-finger gestures for things like switching apps, searching Cortana, and toggling Multitasking view

4. Better tab management; An addition to Microsoft’s Edge browser makes it easier to keep track of your tabs. If you have a bunch of tabs open. You’ll find a new Set these tabs aside button to the left of Edge’s address bar.


Microsoft Edge: 5 key improvements with the Creators Update
1. Tab organization; Edge offers two new ways to manage your tabs with the Creators Update.

2. Read ebooks in Edge.

3. Import bookmarks.

4. Translate extension; Translates a website into more than 50 languages with a single click of the Translator icon in the address bar.

5. Streaming Netflix in 4K, requires a 4K monitor.



MY HEART WILL GO ON:

 

Sunday, April 9, 2017

CREATE A RECOVERY DRIVE

Dear Classmates,

I've been getting calls from other classmates that their computer will not boot up, they may have gotten a virus.  Now they have to take their computer to an expert and pay to fix the computer. If you have a Recovery Drive on a USB thumb drive, you can restore your computer to the day you bought it. You lose all your files, like documents, photos, etc. that you put on it. Your Recovery Drive only works on your computer.

A recovery drive can help you troubleshoot and fix problems with your PC, even if it won’t start. To create one, all you need is a USB drive.

I just created one and it took over 30 minutes.
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Go to Control Panel, click on Recovery, click on Create a recovery drive, click on Yes. Below are just the first 2  screens you will get. There are 3 more.





  













When it’s done, you might see a Delete the recovery partition from your PC link on the final screen. If you want to free up drive space on your PC, select the link and then select Delete. If not, select Finis
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Thursday, March 30, 2017

I just got a call from a classmate.
He received an email from FedEx saying
"FedEx: Delivery Problems Notification." He clicked on the link
and it downloaded a virus.

He is paying an expert to remove it.

I called FedEx and received this information:





Fraudulent Email Alert
We have received reports of fraudulent emails with the subject line "FedEx: Delivery Problems Notification." These emails can contain links which, when clicked, will connect the user to a site which then infects their computer.
These links can point to any number of infected websites all over the globe. Some of these sites may look like fedex.com, while others do not.
If you receive a message matching the description below, do not open the email or click on the hyperlink. Delete the email immediately or forward it to abuse@fedex.com.
FedEx does not send unsolicited emails to customers requesting information regarding packages, invoices, account numbers, passwords or personal information.

Wednesday, February 22, 2017


ALERT, ALERT, THIS IS A BIG TIME WARNING.
This showed up on my email and looks innocent enough, but it is so dangerous.
Looks like it is from Chase Bank.



Please notice it says Chase but if you double click on it, it reveals the true sender
us275pakmail@earthlink.net. (SEE BELOW)  If you click on the fake account address they give you, They will have your ID and Password.

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Saturday, January 28, 2017



Please change my email address from 

joeisaac@twc.com   

to joeisaac1234@gmail.com    

Thank you kindly, 

Joe


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Wednesday, January 11, 2017


I will be 91 next month. I've been teaching Windows for 21 years.
Mike Seiler will take over my 2nd Tuesday 7pm Windows SIG.
I will be semiretired in CKCS, and will send out my class email and jokes ever other month.
Will still take calls to help with computer problems
Will still maintained my web sites:
Joe does Windows:  http://www.ckcs.org/joetips.pdf 
I really like working with such great classmates.
Kindest regards,

Joe Isaac
414 Southridge Drive
Lexington KY 40505-1532
859-299-6464
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About Me

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Lexington, KY., United States
Taught Windows from 1995 -2016